Tuesday, January 10, 2012

Mortal Conception???


Shakespeare said it best: "I will live in thy heart, die in thy lap, and be buried in thy eyes..."

Now some people may wonder what that means. Truthfully, this is why I became a fan in high school. Shakespeare had a way of talking dirty without it sounding as though he were. He spoke fondly of a woman bringing him to orgasm. In all of my musings, silly me, I always assumed this meant the man had to be alive, breathing and in full use of his body.

My grandmother always told me that you can learn something new everyday. Over the holiday period, a woman by the name of Felicity Maramaduke, 38 years-old mortuary worker became pregant by a corpse that she was working on!!!

According to reports, she was bathing the corpse when the body became erect. A post mortem erection as it is called. She climbed on top and had sex with the body, at which time. she confessed to Lexington Missouri police, the body ejaculated. Several months later, she discovered she was pregnant. After explaining to her doctor how she became pregnant, he alerted the authorities and Marmaduke was held on $250,000 bond.

From further research, I found out that when a person dies, it takes a while for the body to lose all bodily functions. Corpses are known to cry, urinate, ejaculate, etc. until that part of the body fully shuts down.

Now, you would think that would be enough. Apparently no. This chick is suing the estate for child support!